Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda: I Shoulda Celebrated More Independence Days

Celebrate your child's growing independence as they move from childhood on up.

July 4th is a great day of national celebration. It can be a day full of family fun, neighborhood picnics, and community fireworks. July 4th is the perfect day for children to learn about our country's beginnings. But just as I celebrated our country's independence on July 4th, I should have recognized all those independence days my children accomplished and honored their newly acquired freedoms.

We could have started with "Bottles/Diapers/Pacifiers Independence Day." Each of these items has a very important role in a child's life. But none of my three children were still using them upon their high school graduation, so they declared their independence from them sometime. Relinquishing bottles, diapers, and pacifiers are some of the first independent steps a child takes, so why not commemorate these days? These events may pass by unnoticed until you realize that your child hasn't used a diaper in weeks, or the bottle hasn't made it out of the cabinet in days. Maybe your child has gone to sleep unaided for several nights and the pacifier now rests in the dog's bed.

Whenever you notice this independence, celebrate it! Talk to your child and praise him or her for this monumental step in life. Have a family party for the honoree. Take your child to the store to purchase that which he has recently given up, and together donate your purchase to a shelter that needs it. Buy new big boy or girl undies or a special mug to commemorate the occasion. Celebrate your child's independence in these early stages to support their efforts and give them confidence as they grow.

Celebrate "Tricycle/Training Wheels Independence Day." Riding a bicycle is a progressive undertaking. Each new bicycle requires new skills and continued practice for mastery. "Taking off the training wheels" is literally a metaphor for a child's life as he has to let go of known security to explore new adventures. Celebrate those days of physically moving to new challenges by taking pictures, phoning family and friends, and recording your child's feelings about this occasion.

Allow your child to pass along the old cycle to a younger child, and let him teach the new owner all about bicycle riding. By honoring each forward step, we support our children, increase their self-confidence, and encourage them to keep aspiring for new goals.

Celebrate "Babysitters Independence Day." One day it will happen - you will go out and leave your child alone for the first time. You've prepared them and you know you're both ready for this step. Celebrate this day by taking them out for a grown-up lunch. Foot the bill for a babysitting course. With the money you save on babysitters, offer to pay your child for tasks to be completed in your absence. While the first time alone may be a scary time for everyone, it's a significant step in independence. Honor this day as you did when your child took his first steps - by recognizing it as the day he or she takes those first steps toward adulthood.

We want our children to grow up, and then watch them grow up too quickly. By encouraging and honoring their independence, we give them the courage to keep going. By celebrating those days they gain that independence, we assure our children of our unending and unconditional love.

About the Author:

Luanne Davidson is the proud mother of three adult children and wonders what might have been if she had done a thing or two differently. She writes her "Coulda, Woudla, Shoulda" column each Thursday.

Do Something Silly

Help your kids find creative ways to spend their summer being silly.

Does the routine and responsibility of life ever get you down? Does the mundane tire you? Well, sometimes we need to liven things up a bit by doing something out of the ordinary... something downright silly. Turn up the volume for your favorite CD and dance on your bed. Have a shaving cream battle in your backyard. Wear your pajamas to the movie theater. Swing on the swings under the stars. The artist Julia Cameron says, "Enthusiasm is grounded in work, not play... At the heart of this play is the mystery of joy." Play renews your zeal for life. So, get your creative juices flowing and do something silly... just for fun!

Quick Tip:
Have a play date for yourself once a week. Paint, draw, write, knit, sing, sew. Be renewed by exercising your creativity.

Definition:
Creativity is thinking of new ideas; dreaming of what can be.

Read:
Oh, The Thinks You Can Think
by Dr. Seuss

Talk:
1. What is your favorite thing to think about in this story?
2. What is this story encouraging you to do?
3. Your Big World: Besides making up words and drawing pictures, what are some other ways you can use your imagination and creativity? How is imagination and creativity helpful to you and others?

Act:
Play dress up with your family and go out for ice cream in your fancy clothes.

About the Author:

Tamara Batarseh, Executive Director of Love In A Big World (LBW), is a singer/songwriter/performer with over fifteen years of performance experience. She is co-founder of LBW and has been the creator of the organization’s programs and materials. Batarseh has recorded two albums, written LBW’s character education curriculum, trained LBW’s performers, and performed live for thousands of kids.

More Of A Good Thing

Each week we are at the Franklin Farmer's Market learning and growing together. Local foods and activities for the children continue to build this community oriented market.

This past weekend, we were at the Children's Garden at The Franklin Farmer's Market (as we are each Saturday through the end of October). We are here each week to offer activities for children and teach them about sustainability and local living.

Even the gorwn-ups got involved to help with the fun and learning.

My rant for the day: I see how much it means to these kids to be here each week. To see their faces when they see our tent set up and toys for THEM, I can see how special they feel. We hope that by being here we will continue to encourage kids and parents to learn about local farming, buy local foods, and support their community. This community really means to much to me. When my little girl met "our farmers" a few weeks ago, she really made a connection. If you have yet to see our CSA piece, please read it!

Rain Or Shine!

Rain or shine we are conserving water and working to keep our local water just a little cleaner.

This past week, we had one of our many Rain Barrel Workshops with the Cumberland River Compact. We sent about twenty people home with at least one rain barrel to catch their rain water. Our goal in continuing to have these workshops to continue to remind people how easy it is to make a difference. The more people who have rain barrels, the better. I have two set up side-by-side in my back yard (right beside my compost bin, so that one overflows into the other when full.

I continue to bring in my little girl to this because we want everyone to know that kids are just as capable as we are to learn about water conservation, preservation, and enhancement.

The Cumberland River Compact

The Cumberland River Compact's goal is to "enhance the water quality" of the Cumberland River. One of the major issues that cause pollution in the Cumberland River is runoff water. This is water that is filled with dirt, debris, and other "stuff" that comes of our houses, roads and yards each time it rains. The idea behind these rain barrels is control. If we capture as much water as possible, we can use it at our disposal, and keep it from running off into our lakes, rivers, and streams.

Other Benefits

Another one of the great benefits (sort of an unexpected side-effect that's also a benefit), is a lower water bill! In the summer months when we have less rain, a rain barrel helps to have water readily available to water plants, food, and lawns. If you have not had a chance to get to one of our Rain Barrel Workshops, please try to make it out. If you live outside the area, contact your local watershed and see if they offer ways to help conserve rain water.

The Way Our Workshop Worked

Twenty people signed up for our workshop prior to the day of the workshop.

We met at Warner Park Nature Center on Highway 100 here in Nashville. Our attendees got a brief welcome from one of the Naturalists at the park.

When she was finished with her information, we headed outside for the hands-on portion of the workshop where our attendees assembled their barrels. My little one walked around and gave encouragement to people as they assembled, then loaded their barrels. The entire workshop runs about an hour.

If you've been to one of our Rain Barrel Workshops, please let us know what you thought! If not, please let us know how we could make it easier for more people to attend.

Shine Some Light

Shine the light of hope on the world around you by changing your perspective.

What is your light?

I was looking through my emails, and through a chain of links ended up on a website called BringLight.com. It got me thinking yet again about the power of positive thinking. It seems the past two weeks I've been inundated with emails from poor souls who don't have any passion in their lives, or don't know how to dream. How did we all become stuck in a world with no hope?

Do we really have no hope, or is the problem in our own perspective? Life balance is teetering on a tightrope of work, work, and more work in our society. We get caught up in doing all the time and sooner or later, the day has flown by and it's merely been a day of survival. Community gets thrown by the wayside as we hurry to get our errands run, our chores done, and the bills paid. When we get together with friends, our talks quickly go to the long list of "to-dos" and becomes a competition on who has put more hours in at work, or has the wildest child, or anything else that puts us in the martyr role.

Our tunnel of work becomes so long that all we see are the dark items on each side - we lose sight of how we can "bring light" to the end—the reasons we do what we do.

What is the goal of making money? What is the goal of buying groceries? Working? Carting kids to events? Lugging the whole family to church? Isn't it all to achieve a better, more fulfilling life? Isn't it all to embrace the "light" in all of our lives? Our children, our spouses, our friends, our parents... the music we love, the nature we relish, the time spent learning about new places, people and causes. Don't we all have something to be thankful for?

When you look outside your window this summer, and see the green leaves and the buds blooming, how can you say there is no hope? Even the plants are excited about this new day. When you are surrounded by negativity, your tunnel gets longer and longer as your bright light of hope gets muddied in the mess. But remember, no matter where you are, there are rays of sunshine peeking through, both figuratively and literally.

Take the time to notice them. Embrace each light in your life, no matter how small. You'll find the more you notice them, the brighter those lights become.

Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda: I Should Have Created More Collages

Collage making with our kids can be a valuable tool in teaching diversity, similarity, and self-expression.

Collage is a great way to describe families. We're a complete picture made up of different things that are glued together. If I had realized this could be a great way to teach my children, we would have created more collages.

We would have started by talking about the meaning of collage and how different parts are vital in making up the whole picture. We would have looked for examples all around us. We would have examined the different people who make up families, different grades that make up schools, or different rooms in our own home. We would have talked about how each thing is different, but necessary in creating the whole. By understanding the concept of dissimilar things being a part of a unit, children can embrace their individuality and importance within the family.

We would have created our own personal collages. Each of us would have found pictures, words, stickers, or other items that depict who we were at the time. We would have found examples of our academic interests, our playtime interests, and our personal interests. By creating an individual collage, children become aware of and honor those unique characteristics that make them special.

We would have compared how our individual collages overlapped. We would have noticed how some of us enjoyed sports, while others liked the same kind of books. We would have seen how our similarities bind us together as a family. By comparing common interests, children can discover ways to connect with each other.

We would have created our own family collage. We would have grouped common interests that bound us together and created areas where we celebrated individualities. I would have displayed all our collages to honor the diversity of our family through our common interests and our particular interests. We would have periodically changed our collages as our interests changed.

I would have used collages to illustrate other ideas. We could have created a collage about a world issue by identifying a particular need, researching it, and creating a collage with pictures, information, and ways we could help. We could have used collages to create chore charts, gift lists, and vacation plans. Preschoolers would be able to understand without reading, and older children would have the opportunity to use their creative talents.

I could have used collages for my children to express their feelings. They could have used pictures with facial expressions, words to describe thoughts and situations, and colors or symbols to represent feelings. Sometimes children have a hard time expressing their feelings, but collages could be a great starting point for parents and children to communicate.

Collages are a great way for us to recognize all the parts that make us, our family, and our world one finished picture. They are a great way to teach and to express feelings. By using collages, we can promote unity through diversity, express thoughts and ideas when words fail us, and teach concepts in creative ways. Collages are what families are all about, and the finished work of art is always a work of love.

About the Author:

Luanne Davidson is the proud mother of three adult children and wonders what might have been if she had done a thing or two differently. She writes her "Coulda, Woudla, Shoulda" column each Thursday.

Do Something Nostalgic

Bring your ancestry into your daily life.

My 95 year old grandmother passed away last week. She lived a good, long life full of love and laughter. Even though my Gram and I were close, particularly when I was young, there was much I didn't know about her until the funeral.

Listening to stories and looking at old black and white photographs of her, my great-grandmother, my great-aunt, my mother and her sister, I discovered myself. I gratefully found my place with the women in my family. What can you learn about yourself from your ancestry? Don't wait until someone dies to uncover the mysteries of your past. This summer do something nostalgic!

Quick Tip:
Scan old family photos so you can share them with relatives.

Definition:
Gratitude is being thankful for what you have and what others do for you or give to you.

Read:
Wilfrid Gordon McDonald Partridge
by Mem Fox

Talk:
What does Wilfrid decide to do for Miss Nancy?
What does Wilfrid give Miss Nancy? How does Miss Nancy respond?
Your Big World: What do you have to give to the elderly people you know?

Act:
Relive a memory from your past by doing a favorite thing with your family - play a game, sing a song, or eat a bowl of chocolate peanut butter ice-cream together.

About the Author:

Tamara Batarseh, Executive Director of Love In A Big World (LBW), is a singer/songwriter/performer with over fifteen years of performance experience. She is co-founder of LBW and has been the creator of the organization’s programs and materials. Batarseh has recorded two albums, written LBW’s character education curriculum, trained LBW’s performers, and performed live for thousands of kids.

Book Review: Meet The Author

Read an interview with an inspiring author that we think is really COOL! Interview with Lee Welles

For the past few weeks, we have been talking about Lee Welles' Gaia Girl books. After reading the reviews I felt inspired and wanted to talk directly to Ms. Welles. Her two books have hidden codes in the illustration and there are also puzzles and games in the back. Welles has truly created books for children that encourage creativity and explorations, inspire change, teach our children about the world - what each of us choose to do daily with our kids.

Interview With Lee Welles

What inspired you to write your Gaia Girl series?

I had been reading about Gaia Theory and had a classic writer's moment, "What if..." I wondered what would happen if the Earth were a living creature AND could talk. I decided kids would hear it because they are much more open seeing and hearing things. I wondered how the Earth would present itself and the whole scene unfolded before my eyes. For those that have, or will read book one, [Gaia Girls Enter the Earth][], this is where a young girl meets Gaia, in the form of a talking otter!

Can you tell us a little more about the Gaia Theory?

Just as we have many living creatures making up our living bodies (think about the good bacteria, the pro-biotics, so necessary to digestion), we are one small living thing that makes up a part of a larger living thing. It is symbiosis as seen from space. The Earth meets a lot of the criteria of a living thing. Consider the way it maintains a relatively constant oxygen level - a bit less, no aerobic creatures, a bit more and you have explosions! It is a delicate balance of life maintaining the conditions for life.

What is your favorite childhood memory?

I'm happy to say it is hard to chose just one! I had many favorite reading places - in trees, in our barn, along the creek - anywhere I could tuck away and get lost in a good story. However, when my cousins would come visit the farm in the summer, we were outdoors more than in - catching fireflies, having salamander races, catching pollywogs and crayfish, swinging on the rope in the barn, building forts and swimming in the pond. I treasure all those memories because they are the foundation of my love for nature.

How do you hope your writing will inspire our children for change?

I hope my writing will remind kids of all the magic that is just outside the door. Nature is never boring and doesn't require an outlet. The natural world also reflects back to us things we need to know about ourselves, it is a wonderful teacher. My greatest hope is that, in the long run, the next generation will see the value in wild places and our deep-seeded need to touch and experience those wild places.

If there's one thing you could say to children about saving the world, what would it be?

Saving the world is the same as saving yourself. The world is very old and has been without people before. We are the animals that figured out how to "get around the rules." What will we do with that knowledge? The grown-ups have, for the most part, gotten it wrong. The kids can get it right!

Is there anything else you would like to add?

Think before you shop. Every time you spend a dollar you say, "Yes" to something. It is like throwing a rock in a pond, there are ripple effects when we spend money. As you get older, pay attention to your ripples. See how nature gave me that nice analogy!

Send us your child's favorite and most creative outdoor activity and we will send you one of Lee Welles' famous books!

michelle@coolpeoplecare.org

In The Series

Book Review: "Gaia Girls Enter The Earth," part I
Book Review: "Gaia Girls Way Of Water," part II

Food Allergies: Going Out To Eat

Food allergies effect more and more people. Learn some indications and signs that you or someone you know may have allergies to some foods.

Often times, having food allergies can feel extremely isolating. I have felt like I cannot go anywhere because my food allergies are so bad. Feeling like you cannot go to friends houses or out to eat feels very limiting and pulls away from relationships, but you will be surprised at how many people are accommodating. You and your children do not have to stay home just because of food allergies. Over the last few years, I have learned a great deal about ways I can be around others and not be "impaired" by my allergies.

I have actually called friends that I am to have dinner with and told them about my allergies. They made me a salad with all that I needed and a dish that had none of my allergy foods. When I go to my parents' house for supper, they know what I can and cannot eat and I usually bring side dishes of my my own. So we are taken care of when we go out to friends' houses. All you have to do is ASK!

Going to restaurants is much the same. Many restaurants these days offer Gluten-free options or menus with ingredients so you can choose exactly what you want with ease. The key point is to ASK. If the restaurant does not offer a menu, simply ask to speak with the chef and request a meal with the specifications you need. You can also call in advance to see what restaurants have to offer.

Most people are not well informed about food allergies, so some restaurants may require more explanation than others. Getting an allergy card may be helpful for restaurants, too. If they are not informed, it's important to talk to them about a few things.

Reminders To Restaurants

• Cross-Contamination
  Make sure to ask the chef or waiter to cook your food in a separate pan from foods that you are allergic to - on a clean cooking surface. Many places offer salads with croutons and mix them in a large bowl. Ask for clean mixing utensils.
  

• Sauces
  Many people do not know that things like soy sauce, bouillons, and broths have gluten. Many sauces have butter, cream or lactose in them. Make sure to ASK what is in any sauce. If you are aware, you will know what to look for.
  

Questions You Can Ask

• Does the salad come with croutons? If so, can you please leave them off?
  
• Are your salad dressings made in-house? What are the ingredients?
  
• Are your soups made in-house? What are the ingredients?
  
• Are marinades used? Are basting sauces used? Is a grilling-baste used?
  
• Are your sauces made in-house?
• Do the foods get dusted with flour prior to cooking?
  
• Is the oil used to make your fries also used for other breaded items?
  
• Do you use imitation bacon or meat substitute on anything?
  
• Are your mashed potatoes from a mix?
  
• Do you use imitation crab meat or seafood?
  
• Will the ice cream have a anything on it?
  

In The Series

Food Allergies: The Beginning For Me
Food Allergies: The INs And OUTs Of Them

Cool People In The Community: Tennessee Educates

From the classroom, into the real world - students and teachers are learning more about how we can save the world around us.

Here at CoolPeopleCare, Inc. we are always eager to see other people out there making a difference. When we met Tami from Project CENTS, we knew this was something our readers would want to hear about. Project CENTS is a Tennessee based program that seeks to educate and inform students about sustainability and conservation. Tami is the Coordinator for Project CENTS and is out there seeking to make the world a better place.

Can you tell us the story of how the Project CENTS program came to be?

Project CENTS is an inter-agency partnership between the Tennessee Department of Education and the Tennessee Department of Environment and Conservation. C E N T S stands for Conservation Education Now for Tennessee Students. During the 1980's, and 1990's, thousands of teachers and non-formal educators were trained in environmental education materials used nationally such as Project Learning Tree, Project WILD, and Project WET. The program fell under the budget cut axes of the late 1990's.

Since 2005, with the reinstatement of Project CENTS, time tested lessons from Project Learning Tree, Project WILD and Project WET have been correlated to state curriculum standards, enabling teachers to enhance students understanding of the natural world while working within their required curriculum.

What inspired you to work with CENTS?

I came to CENTS directly from the classroom. My last assignment of my 21-year teaching career was in Biology and environmental science at Hume-Fogg Academic High School in Nashville. During that time, I realized that it was imperative to connect book learning with the real world outside the classroom, but there were lots of obstacles to doing this. I saw the Project CENTS position as an opportunity for me to work on removing some of those obstacles.

How does this program differ from other Conservation programs in the state?

Project CENTS is the only conservation education program at the Department of Education. I work directly with teachers.

How does CENTS get kids in the community involved with hands-on experiences?

Project CENTS is a program for educators. Educator workshops give teachers experience with new ideas and activities that are designed to get students outdoors.

What is the biggest shock kids have when they begin to see issues around conservation in their communities?

For most of the high school students I have known, the shock is that the adults in charge aren't doing more to protect natural resources and change policy to support sustainable practices.

How could people get more involved in helping this program?

If you are looking for ways to facilitate children's experiences in the outdoors and/or help them understand natural processes, come to a Project CENTS educator workshop. Groups of educators (formal or non-formal), can schedule a workshop specifically for their group. Workshops are appropriate for classroom teachers, scout leaders, youth leaders, after school and day care teachers - anyone who works with students ages 4-18. Tell your child's teacher or principal about Project CENTS Educator workshops. Check Environmental Education In Tennessee for Summer Workshop opportunities.

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For information about scheduling a workshop, e-mail Tamara.Coleman@state.tn.us