Category Archives: Safety

Project SHARE

Posted on August 27, 2010 by coolmomscare| Leave a comment

In February, Mayor Karl Dean convened a Task Force to develop a Child and Youth Master Plan for Nashville and Davidson County. After six months of work, the task force completed Nashville’s first-ever Children and Youth Master Plan.

The plan charged the community to address 14 distinct areas of concern. Included in the plan are the following findings:

• 1/3 of MNPS students responding to a 2007 school culture/climate survey reported not having an adult they could talk to about their problems.

• Community survey respondents ranked ensuring academic achievement and providing a safe and caring school environment as the two most pressing issues that the community needs to work on (CYMP Community Survey, 2010).

• Almost half of school-age children suffer from depression, anxiety or aggression after becoming homeless (The Institute for Children and Poverty)

• Children and youth in Davidson County between the ages of 6-13 report involvement in bullying in some way at significantly higher rates than their peers nationally (Olweus Survey, 2005-2008).

• 1 in every 8 people in Davidson County is unable to read (Community Needs Assessment for Adult Literacy, 2010)

Monroe Harding is addressing these concerns through the Project SHARE program. Project SHARE matches adult volunteers with young people in the elementary schools. Over 500 elementary students need a positive adult in their lives. More volunteers are needed. A commitment of just one hour per week can dramatically change the outcome of a life.

Training will be provided. Contact the Project SHARE Coordinator, Laquita Harrison for more information at (615) 665-1409 or laquitaharrison@tnyouthconnections.net.

Options for volunteering include:

Project SHARE One on One Mentoring: Project SHARE volunteers teach at-risk elementary students skills necessary to engage appropriately and succeed in the classroom. These mentors spend one hour a week working individually with elementary students during the school day, throughout the semester or school year. Activities include reading, helping with class work, playing games or just talking.

Project SHARE English Language Learners Assistants: Spanish speaking volunteers are needed to spend classroom time with elementary students struggling to learn the English language. Teachers present curriculum in English, the volunteers are on-site to assist with class work in both English and Spanish to help ease the learning experience. Other languages welcome as well.

Safe at Last Education (SAL): Volunteers spend approximately ½ hour in each classroom presenting the Safe At Last curriculum to the entire class. Children utilize SAL skills to recognize unsafe situations such as abuse and inappropriate sexual behaviors. The volunteers teach children how to differentiate between good and bad touches, identify safe people, along with assertiveness and problem solving if they are in an unsafe situations.

Bullying Prevention Classroom Participation: Students in metro schools are taught the school-wide anti-bullying philosophy. Mentors help encourage the students to recognize bullying, to respond to it and how to avoid being a bully.

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Activities, Attitude of Gratitude, Development, Diversity, Education, Family, Safety, Volunteer, self-esteem

From One Mother To Another

Posted on June 30, 2010 by coolmomscare| Leave a comment

I have been fortunate enough to give birth to two beautiful, healthy babies. And, I confess, I took the whole birthing experience for granted. I didn’t worry about whether there would be the appropriate medical supplies available for the doctor to use, let alone if they were sterile. But, many women in developing countries (where infant and maternal mortality is high) must give birth in unsafe and unsanitary conditions.

Here’s how one mother can help another. By donating $25 to IMA World Health, you can sponsor a  Safe Motherhood Kit, which is designed to “provide a clean delivery and safe birth.” Included in the kit are sterile items for childbirth and warm clothes for the newborn.  In addition, “IMA provides education on the importance of clean and sterile birthing procedures and training of the proper use of a Safe Motherhood Kit.”  These kits are sent to Tanzania and the Democratic Republic of Congo in Africa, as well as Haiti in the Caribbean – areas where infant and maternal mortality rates are among the highest in the world.

IMA World Health

Safe Motherhood Kits

- Malinda Moseley

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Activities, Attitude of Gratitude, Development, Diversity, Education, Family, Health & Wellness, Healthcare & Medical Issues, Poverty, Safety, Volunteer

What One-Half Looks Like

Posted on May 5, 2010 by coolmomscare| Leave a comment

Nashville Flood

City officials in Nashville are asking people to cut their water usage by one half. The math seems easy, but the call is too abstract. The intentions are great, but the call isn’t urgent enough – nor is it easy to understand.

After all, who out there can tell me – right now - how many gallons of water you use each day?Anyone? Of course not. It’s not something you normally keep track of. You never needed to. It was never a concern. You could easily tell me what you spent at Starbucks yesterday or how often you fill your gas tank. But no one knows how much water they use. How then can you know if you cut your usage by 50%?

Instead, the city needs to be direct on how to use (or not use) water. Don’t give me vague numbers. Tell me what to do. If they won’t, we will.

  • Don’t wash your car. Don’t.
  • Cut off your sprinkler system at home and at work (we’re looking at you, Bicentennial Mall).
  • Smell your armpits. Do you stink? No? Don’t shower. Your friends will still be your friends.
  • Don’t wash your clothes unless you’re out of underwear. Put on jeans and a T shirt and go to work. If your boss gives you crap, let him know there is a flood.
  • Let the dirty dishes stack up. No one will judge you.
  • Use and reuse the same drinking glass all day.
  • If you must shower, get in and out in four minutes. Set a timer. Be diligent.
  • Don’t shave. Armpits, legs, face, back, or knuckles.
  • Your dog? He can also go without a bath for a few days.
  • It’s time to use a bucket. Any time you turn the faucet on, catch the water and use it to wash what needs washing. Don’t toss it out or just let it run down the drain.
  • Don’t use a hose to clean off debris and dirt from your sidewalk. Let it dry and use a broom. If you’re unfamiliar with what a broom is, click here.
  • You don’t have to flush your toilet every time you use it. We’ll let you be the judge on how often you flush. Just see what happens if you let it mellow for a bit.

Chances are, if you do the above, you’ll cut your usage by more than half. But who’s counting?

- Sam Davidson

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Activities, Attitude of Gratitude, Conservation & the Environment, Education, Family, Food & Beverage, Health & Wellness, Healthcare & Medical Issues, Recycle and Reuse, Safety, Volunteer

Tornado Talk

Posted on April 23, 2010 by coolmomscare| Leave a comment

I have flashbacks to last spring when my 4-year-old daughter and my very pregnant self spent a few hours in our downstairs hall closet riding out severe weather and the very possible threat of a tornado. I tried to keep her calm and somewhat distracted by playing a game and reading books to her while keeping one eye on the television as the storm progressed.

The weather service is calling for severe storms here in Nashville tomorrow with the possibility of tornados. Is my family going to spend the afternoon in our hall closet? We’ll see. It got me thinking about how to explain severe weather to my children. Luckily, there is a website that can help me: www.tornadotalk.com. Parents are able to access a free e-book, “How To Talk To Your Kids About Tornados”, as well as safety checklists and other learning tools.

I’ll be using this information tomorrow, I am pretty sure.

- Malinda Moseley

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Activities, Education, Family, Health & Wellness, Safety, Uncategorized

Still Helping Haiti

Posted on February 24, 2010 by coolmomscare| Leave a comment

It’s been six weeks since a significant earthquake struck Haiti, and while a lot of money has been raised, the relief efforts continue. And, the rebuilding efforts will take years. You can help make a difference in a lot of very unique ways:

- Sam Davidson

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Activities, Attitude of Gratitude, Conservation & the Environment, Diversity, Food & Beverage, Health & Wellness, Healthcare & Medical Issues, Politics & Justice, Poverty, Safety, Travel, Volunteer

Dear World

Posted on February 9, 2010 by coolmomscare| 6 Comments

Put the wind at her back when she runs.

As I write this, Zoey, my 21 month old, is sitting on her new potty. It’s an Elmo-themed toddler-sized toilet seat that fits over the regular seat in our bathroom. Zoey is carefully looking through a Sesame Street book as she is perched on her new throne. She points out the characters to me: “Ig Ird! Ookie Onter! Emo!” I am sitting on the floor at her feet in the age-old position of student and teacher. I listen, enthralled. To my surprise, I notice that I am also a little sad.

Potty training is the beginning of Zoey becoming independent. Between this new potty seat and the fact that Zoey and I are visiting a school later in the week, I’m feeling a little undone. It’s not that I’ll miss changing diapers or that I have no idea what to do with 4 hours of free time a week. Please. Bye-bye diapers! Don’t let the door hit you on the way out! And free time? Hm, let me think about that for half a second . . . . I’m feeling a little blue because my life and Zoey’s life are going to be on different paths more and more often. She is going to have experiences that I’m not there to see. Or to protect her from. And it will be good for both of us . . . right?

So, Big-World-Out-There, big beautiful world, please be kind to my daughter. Show her how things grow and how to be kind and how to walk her own path. Catch her when she falls. Put the wind at her back when she runs. And help her remember the way home. Please, world, please.

- Joslyne Decker


→ 6 Comments

Posted in Activities, Attitude of Gratitude, Development, Family, Health & Wellness, Safety, self-esteem

Our Adoption Story IV: Getting Ready

Posted on December 1, 2009 by coolmomscare| 3 Comments

The next step was talking to the birth mother on the phone. She had some questions for us. We had some questions for her. And just to make things more interesting, Victoria, the birth mom, was having early but painful contractions. Demetri and I sat on our bed, side by side, hand in hand, each on separate phone extensions. I’m not going to share the specifics of the phone call, it involved too many personal details for all involved. But I will tell you that Victoria’s voice was thin and strong at the same time – like a thousand folded origami cranes that have the power to make a wish come true. I sounded too cheerful, too ready.  My husband, Demetri, sounded kind, patient.  He sounded like he is – the kind of guy that wears work pants and wool sweaters and likes to tinker in the garage.

We did not have that ‘instant connection’ with Victoria that I had so often read about. And it hurt me. The conversation was flat, halting, empty.  It left me feeling raw around the edges with a tender, fleshy hole inside. The social worker, who mediated the call, reminded us that Victoria was in pain. She told us that what might be the happiest day in our life was going to be the hardest day in Victoria’s life.  And there’s just no way to balance that.  None. But despite the guarded phone conversation, or maybe because of it, we had a match.  Victoria picked us.  We picked her.  We picked to have something in common for the rest of our lives.

So, we thought, we’ll have a baby in two weeks.  We marked the due date on the calendar.  We went to bed thinking about all we had to do.  In the morning we decided to go out and get some basic baby stuff.  We consulted Demetri’s two sisters who each have three kids.  We consulted my BFF and her husband who just had their daughter 4 months ago.  We were told to buy lots of baby pajamas but nothing with a waist band.  We were told to get the little shirts with snaps and the cuffs that fold over the hands.  We were told to get a thermometer with a flexible tip and depth marker.  And it was around the suggestion the thermometer that I began to get scared.  Then, we actually went to the baby story and I passed quickly from scared into terrified and panicky.  We couldn’t even tell which clothes were pajamas.  We had to make several phone calls.  Demetri’s sister finally said, “Just look for things with snaps and built-in feet.”  We also bought a couple of baby gown bags because someone said it made diaper changing easy.  And socks.  Tenny, tiny socks.  There were more consultation phone calls about what constitutes a swaddling blanket as opposed to a regular blanket.  There were Google searches about baby bottles and BPA.  We bought the smallest size diapers they made. We bought a sturdy canvas baby bag to put everything in.

We came home exhausted.  My mom made us chicken, twice baked potatoes, green beans, and watermelon for dinner.  We went to bed early.  We slept well.  We woke up and decided to paint the hall way so that when the baby came home in a few weeks the house would look nice.  Like she could even see that far in front of her face.  But we didn’t know that at the time – we hadn’t read the parenting book yet.  We were holding up paint swatches in the sun coming through the window, trying to decide between moon mist and linen, when my cell phone rang.  It was Brenda, the social worker calling to check in.  She said these words exactly, “You can go to Rhode Island and pick-up your little girl.  She was born an hour ago.”

Our suitcase was filled with dirty laundry.  We carried the baby bag on the plane with us.  And nothing, nothing, could have pried that bag from my hands. Two hours after getting news of the birth we were on a plane.  72 hours after finishing our home study we were on our way to pick up our daughter.  And 11 hours after she was born we saw her for the first time.  Sometimes babies come early.  Who knew?

- Joslyne Decker

→ 3 Comments

Posted in Attitude of Gratitude, Development, Education, Family, Health & Wellness, Safety, Travel, self-esteem

Our Adoption Story II: Paperwork

Posted on November 17, 2009 by coolmomscare| 4 Comments

Ok. So maybe deciding to adopt wasn’t as quick and easy as I made it sound in the last post. True, my husband, Demetri, and I had been talking about adoption before we got married. But it wasn’t always with certainty. There was a lot of fear and anxiety. What if we can’t connect to someone else’s baby? What if there are health problems? What if a birth mother never chooses us? We researched adoption. We read books. We watched informational videos. We overcame our fears enough to move forward. And we were met with a whole new set of questions: Did we have a preference for gender, race, or age? Were we willing to adopt a baby from a birth mom who did not get prenatal care? Who smoked marijuana? Who drank during pregnancy? Who had a history of any kind of mental illness?

We did more research. Read more books. Had lots of talks, discussions, and arguments with each other and ourselves. Gradually we were able to answer the questions. We did not have a preference for gender or race. However, I was adamant that we adopt a new born. As a social worker I had worked with many kids that had been adopted after they were a year or older. These kids were great, and many of their families were great, but some of the kids were working their way through Reactive Attachment Disorder.* And it was always a long, hard battle for everyone involved. Although I was good at working with these kids in a 50 minute session, I knew my limits. We would not be adopting an ‘older’ child. We also decided that we were only willing to work with birth moms that had at least some prenatal care, who did not drink during pregnancy, and with a limited history of mental illness (depression and anxiety stuff was OK, Schizophrenia etc. not OK). After consulting a doctor, we decided that infrequent marijuana use was OK. After many discussions, we decided an open (or semi-open) adoption would work well for us and for our baby.

Next up: We had to get a home study. This is the part where a stranger comes into your home (albeit a nice, social worky one) and evaluates your potential for parenthood. And, if you live where I live, you are asked to sign a “statement of faith” promising to raise a child you don’t even have yet in “the one true faith” as a “follower of Christ”. This presented a . . . “problem” for me. Demetri and I were totally unwilling to sign a statement of faith. For one, we would be lying. For two, one does not need to be “a follower of Christ” to be a good parent. Apparently, in this part of the south they haven’t heard that two-thirds of the world is not Christian. I called out of state and tried to cut a deal where we would pay for hotel and meals so a social worker could complete a home study. No luck. Finally, through a referral from Demetri’s work, we found a teeny tiny local agency (they didn’t even have a web site) that did not require a statement of faith. Thank god!

We cleaned the house like it had never been cleaned before. We gave Gilmore, our dog, a bath. We framed pictures in which we thought we looked ‘parental’. We put fire extinguishers in visible places in various rooms. I bought fancy cheese and crackers to serve as a snack. We put on nice clothes. Nice but not too nice — we didn’t want to look like we were trying too hard. We had our paperwork in a brand new, crisp purple folder. We didn’t wear shoes when the social worker arrived so that we would look “casual and relaxed” when she came to the door.

The social worker came. She evaluated. She was kind. She gave us another binder full of paperwork. Yes, a binder. We had to get references. Check-ups and blood tests from the doctor (I even needed a special note as I had a history of minor depression). Proof of marriage. Our educational transcripts (with the college seal). A note from the vet. Fingerprints. Yes, Demetri got fingerprinted at a gun store. Well, not just a gun store, the place also weighed dead deer. As much as I love guns and dead animals, I chose another location for my fingerprints. We also each wrote a 7 page biography. And no, we were not allowed to skip over the embarrassing moments of middle school, poor choices that were made about men while abroad, or that one Grateful Dead concert. So yeah, the paperwork was all vaguely humiliating.

The end result? We passed.

* There are many, many “older” children who are adopted that never ever have to deal with this issue.

- Joslyne Decker

→ 4 Comments

Posted in Diversity, Education, Family, Health & Wellness, Healthcare & Medical Issues, Safety

Simple Act of Appreciation

Posted on November 11, 2009 by coolmomscare| Leave a comment
2524558928_4b0915df60_m

Thank a veteran today.

I was with my grandfather at the grocery store the other day when a woman approached us. She noticed my grandfather’s hat that said “World War II Veteran” and wanted to tell him how much she appreciated his service to our country. She had worked as a nurse at a VA hospital for years and said each time she sees a war veteran she makes it a point to tell them how much she appreciates their service. A few minutes later at the other side of the store a man came up to my grandfather and saluted him. It turns out he had served in Korea. These simple acts of appreciation not only touched my grandfather, but me as well.

I started to think about how I could instill in my son (and myself) the same sense of appreciation. How much do I really know about Veterans Day? What are some ways that I can let my grandfather (and other veterans) know I am thankful for them? How do I get my son involved? I came across a great website that breaks down all things veteran into sections for children in school from grades K-5 and grades 6-12. There is even a section for teachers. There are games and activities, cool facts about veterans, and ways you can get involved.

This Veterans Day, let’s all take the time to say thank you to the veterans in our lives, and involve our children in the process.

http://www4.va.gov/kids/

- Helen Trabue

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Activities, Attitude of Gratitude, Education, Family, Holiday, Safety, Volunteer, self-esteem

The Silver Thread

Posted on October 23, 2009 by coolmomscare| 3 Comments

Last week at Gymboree there was a parachute catastrophe. Well, maybe not a catastrophe, per se . . . maybe more like a debacle. Whatever it was, it changed me as a mom. And it may have scared Zoey, my one year old, away from parachutes for life. It was a big class — 20 or more kids, plus their ‘accompanying adult’ (Our good friend Niki and her daughter Charlotte included). It was such a big class that the big parachute* was taken out. The parachute is supposed to be the highlight of every class. It is supposed to be the most fun. And we, as accompanying adults, are supposed to think it’s the cutest thing. Ever.

So there we are: 20 kids and at least 20 adults, all abuzz with big parachute excitement. We get to the part where the kids are supposed to sit in the middle of the chute while we, the accompanying adults, lift up the edges, walk in a circle, and sing a song about a monkey. But this time, there were so many kids, that they were scattered all over the parachute, not just in the center. When we lifted up the edges a bunch of kids (Zoey among them) went tumbling. The highly trained Gymboree teacher assured us this was OK. Although it seemed less OK to me as the kids continued to tumble over each other. It was a giant pile of babies — which might have been cute if many of the babies hadn’t been screaming (Zoey among them).

Zoey looked up at me from the center of the melee, tears streaming down her face, and wailed, “Na-na!” ** My vision tunneled, and there was only Zoey, scared and needing me. At that moment if anyone has gotten in my way they would have been leveled. Leveled. Her little butterfly of a hand closed around my index finger and that invisible, silver thread that always connects us, always pulls her back to me — touching or not, became steel. Just as I was about to do a slow motion, layout jump into the parachute screaming, “GET AWAY FROM MY BABY”, Niki grabbed Zoey’s other hand and we pulled her out. *** We will be getting a bronze statue of Niki installed in our front yard later in the week.

This 9 seconds was one of the most intense and best experiences of my Reign as Mom. I can say ‘best’ because a) no one was hurt and b) Niki prevented me from making a fool of myself at Gymboree. Another reason I can say ‘best’ is because there was a time I didn’t know if I had the capacity to do what I did — the tunnel vision, mama bear thing.

Did I love Zoey the first moment we met her? Yes. Did I feel connected to her? Not so much . . . I felt overwhelmed and scared and like I had to hold part of myself back in case the adoption didn’t work out. Even after she was legally ours, I felt ‘other’ and wrong and like I wasn’t the good enough mother. Post-partum/post-adoption depression is real. Hormonal, situational, whatever. It’s a dark and lonely place to be. And it’s one hell of a hole to climb out of.

But deep in that muddy, messy hole is where I started to weave that silver thread. I often fumbled it, had to tie knots, had to start over. It’s hard to weave when you can’t see. But I got better at it — learned to go by touch, by heart. The thread got longer and stronger and I climbed up to the light. I climbed out of the hole and was ready to kick ass at Gymboree for that same little baby I used to hold at night, numb, thinking I can’t do this.

Zoey’s little butterfly hand is getting bigger and bigger. Already, sometimes instead of reaching for me, she swats me away. Even though that silver thread will have to get longer and longer — maybe one day even stretch across continents — that thread is forever. And we both know it.

* For those of you not familiar with Gymboree, the appropriate response to the big parachute is ‘Oooooh! Ahhhhhh! Ohhhhh!’.

** The fact that she can’t yet say Mama is the subject for another (bitter) piece.

*** In case you’re wondering, Charlotte was unharmed and remained very serene during the parachute madness

- Joslyne Decker

→ 3 Comments

Posted in Development, Family, Safety, self-esteem